Although I am a tutor on this course, I also know what it is like being on the other side of the text books or laptop screen.  Not just with my own studies, but also as a family supporter of a postgraduate student – in my case my husband.  In fact, I’m writing this the day after his graduation ceremony, so forgive me if I become sentimental and reach for the tissues.  You have been warned!

As an undergraduate you take for granted that the people who love you – mainly your parents – will make sure you’re fed, watered, clothed and generally cared for.  But as a postgrad you quickly realise how much those who share their lives with you have to sacrifice to help you on your journey.  Sunday afternoons out, school plays, trips to the cinema, weekends away… they seem like a distant memory, suspended on a promise of better things to come.  The loss of a housework-friendly spouse to the inner sanctum of the study was a one  I particularly grieved over.

But it’s not just the physical, hands-on help your non-studying supporter will have taken on for you.  It’s the emotional protection they give you that is so often overlooked yet demands the most.  Even just listening to your loved one ventilating about unrealistic assignment deadlines, tight timetables and unintelligible coursework takes its toll – especially when you’re facing a full laundry basket, a heart-broken teenager and an eleventh-hour school project.  Alone.

Or so it seems.  But when you see your spouse or parent, partner, child, sibling or friend in cap and gown, walking up to receive their handshake and certificate… when you listen to the rousing valedictorian speech… even when you’re sipping champagne at your celebratory cocktail party (if you’re lucky)… then you know it’s all been worth it.

At my postgraduate congregation all the graduates turned to face the audience and applauded their friends and family supporters, in a gesture of gratitude that seemed too

small.  I’m welling up with tears just remembering that moment, and it was 6 years ago, such is the power of that simple, heart-felt act (well, I did warn you).  I saw a sea of proud faces – smiling, waving, cheering, clapping – each one had travelled every step of the journey with us.  We just hadn’t really noticed that they were there until that moment.

So when you finally finish your studies and are realising the fruits of your labours, turn to the ones that were with you and say thanks.  One day, if you’re lucky, you may have the opportunity to return the favour.

Dr Vicky Hewitt- Module Leader and Personal Tutor