Reflective Blog

So far, in my role as Peer Mentor I have encountered some problems that I thought it would be beneficial to blog about so that I can be aware of these when I evaluate my development later this semester. For my goal of creative problem solving it is important for me to be aware of any potential or current problems and how I plan to solve these.

One problem I have run into during my first month as a Peer Mentor is the difficulty of finding a meeting time that suits all of my group. Due to peoples timetables being different and some people being in clubs or societies, it appears that no more than 3 out of 7 mentees can meet at the same time. This was very frustrating in the beginning for me as I would hear of Peer Mentors meeting their mentees 5 times within the first 2 weeks. I thought that it was my fault and I struggled to acknowledge that this was out of my control. Thus far, my meetings have just been set once weekly at the time we decided on initially but this means that only a select few of my mentees can attend and I need to ensure that they all can access our meetings.

Some of the ideas I have brainstormed so far to help solve this problem are: hold two meetings each week, have our meetings run like office hours and change the meeting day/time fortnightly so that different people can attend, even if not every week. Although, these ideas have limitations. Firstly, having two meetings each week is demanding on my timetable and I can’t guarantee that I can commit to this each week. Running the meetings like office hours is a good idea in terms of being more accessible to everyone but it makes it seem like a more casual thing and may not encourage my mentees to turn up which may inhibit my development. Lastly, by having a two week rotation of meeting day/time will probably make it more beneficial in the long run but will restrict my mentees from attending any more than once every two weeks if they can only attend one time.

I did draw inspiration for my Mentor Leader and create a doodle poll for my mentees to fill out for me to be able to see when they could attend a meeting but this only proved that only three of them can meet at the same, with some people only being able to meet at a time by themselves. I can meet with my mentees one-on-one or in smaller groups so long as it is in a public setting but this takes up more time and is less effective as it creates more things for me to balance. I am going to write a pros and cons list for all of my options to work out which one is the most effective and then get advice from another mentor or a good leader to see whether they can help me find a more creative solution.

Some problems that could arise in the near future are: my mentees not turning up to meetings or them ignoring our group messages. In order to avoid these I will aim to keep our meetings interesting and engaging, changing location and offering support for aspects of university life they may need advice in (essay writing, balancing workload, referencing, note taking etc). This should ensure that a good amount of my mentees attend our meetings. In terms of them ignoring our group messages, I need to maintain enough contact with them to encourage them to interact with me but I do not want to come across as nagging. One thing I also need to work on is reminding them that this is a volunteer role for me, I do not get paid and I am volunteering my time to help and I would appreciate it if they could attend our group meetings for their own and my sake.

Forbes magazine posted an article called ’10 Steps to Effective Listening’ which provides simple but effective active listening tips such as maintaining eye contact, observing non-verbal cues etc. One tip I found particularly interesting as I hadn’t considered that I may do this is to be attentive, but relaxed. Sometimes I think as people we want to try and look overly interested in what the person or people we are communicating with have to say, that we forget to look normal… You don’t have to stare directly at them the whole time or nod your head every second (something I think I tend to do) to let them know you are listening to them. You just have to be present, give them attention and apply yourself.

The article said to try and avoid distractions such as accent, speech, your own thoughts, feelings, or biases, which I found thought-provoking as I don’t consciously try to block out distractions. I often do find myself focusing on what I have on my plate that week, what I’m going to put on my shopping list, the great Australian accent one of my mentees has or other things that just are not relevant and may make me seem like I am not actively listening.

Another thing that intrigued me when reading this article was that nonverbal cues can sometimes say more than words. People often focus on only the words someone is communicating to them but to be an effective active listener, you must listen to what their body language and mannerisms are saying. This enables you to get a better idea of how the person is feeling regarding what they are discussing. As a listening skills exercise, the article suggests to, at the end of conversations where information is exchanged, conclude with a summary statement to show the person that you have listened and get yourself into a routine of actively listening and retaining information. I will try this in my next meeting with my mentees, at the end of the session to help bring it to an end I will summarise what we have spoken about, anyone’s specific issues and what solutions we have either come up with or will hope to. Hopefully by doing this, I will improve my active listening skills and train myself to always actively listen.

When reading Harvard Business Review, a general management magazine I came across an article called ‘What Great Listeners Actually Do’ that describes four main findings: good listening entails more than being silent while the other person speaks, good listening includes interactions that build a person’s self-esteem, good listening was a co-operative conversation and good listeners tend to make suggestions. A general concensus from my research is that active listening is complex but so effective if done correctly. In order to develop my active listening skills I will devise a plan to implement my findings into my role as a Peer Mentor.

In my PDR I mentioned that whilst at university I have witnessed both effective and communication but after having my one-to-one meeting with my supervisor, I realised that it would be useful to blog what I believe to be ineffective and effective communication and how I measure it. This may be useful at the end of the semester when I come to evaluate my development as I can see whether my opinion is the same or has changed after the research I will be conducting.

For me, effective communication is very clear, concise and confidently put across. If in a lecture, the lecturer puts across information in a simple and understandable way, this is more effective than if they were to use flowery language or way too much information. Sometimes when people are trying to overload somebody with information they may lose their track of thoughts and this causes their communication to deteriorate.

If someone is clearly not confident in themselves as a communicator that can, in my opinion, severely affect their communication and its effectiveness. It’s like how people say fake it until you make it and the idea that if you sound confident people will be more likely to believe what it is you are saying. These are some things I believe make for effective verbal communication but communication goes two ways and to be an effective communicator, you must be an active listener.

Overall, I see people who can confidently communicate to a large group as effective communicators, especially if the audience feel as though they have benefitted from their communication. Communication is about informing, discussing and connecting and if communication is effective, all parties come away feeling that they perhaps learned something, feel positive about the transmission. I will come back to this blog at the end of the semester to see whether my opinion has changed, expanded etc.