NURL A – 46
Hull A – 6
Despite an awe inspiring season so far, NURL 2nds were shipped out to close house to host their final league game of the season against Hull. On a blustery afternoon it was never going to be a classy game of rugby but NURLs dogged determination, which has seen them only lose one game this season, saw them through to win their BUCS north league.
Facing gale force winds in the first half saw NURL penned in their half for the first 10 minutes. Hull took advantage of this and went into an early lead after a vicious assault on Rob Andrew saw the captain leave the field with a large gash to the head.
Their early lead was the only glimmer of hope NURL gave their grotesquely obese opposition as they turned to human wrecking ball Gaz ‘Strawberries and cream’ Herbert to punch some holes in the defence. Not 2 minutes had passed before he crashed over the line, taking the entire Hull defence with him, to put NURL back in the game.
The brute strength of the home side’s pack soon began to show with Russ West and Sean Rawling adding to the oppositions embarrassment by running over several tackles and adding to NURLs points tally. As the second half wore on Hull slipped into a series of handling errors allowing NURLs back line to capitalise. Swift handling from half backs Barry Yeend and Nathan Barry saw father of 3, and general grumpus, Leigh Murkedmanymums, diving over in the corner. Jonny Watts’ lines of running were also rewarded as he took a try in what was his best performance in a NURL shirt.
The whistle for the end of the first half rang out like the clanging chimes of doom for Hull as NURL began to look like making it a rout with their 22-6 half time lead.
The second half saw more brutality from Gaz Herbert who was prevented from scoring a full length try only by the full back after a feigned attempt at a tackle from Hull’s matchstick legged centre. Rewards for the forwards hard work came as the angriest man in NURL, Andi Lenskya trundled over under the posts.
Usain Bolt lookalike Matty Jones then scored a superb brace refusing to touch the ball down until he had rounded every player on the oppositions side. Nurl refused to lie back and kept the pressure on the Hull line with Jack English running over the defence to score to avoid passing to serial drongo David Chattersworth. Had Chattersworth known where the touchline was he may have taken a hat-trick of tries, but his bulging love handles saw him carelessly slip into touch several times mere inches from the try line.
The game was capped off with a deserved try for Barry Yeeeend who’s facial hair for the game resembled something from my big fat gypsy wedding.
After a superb season NURL deservedly clinched the league title and send out a warning message to their dance choreography studying counterparts at Northumbria before Stan Cavert in 2 months time.