The death machine separated the wheat from the chaff in their mountain top battle with the elements.
Adverse weather conditions were to blame for the cancellation of Sheffield Hallams date with death at Cochrane park. However, keen to maintain peak fitness ahead of Stan Calvert, the AUs most beloved team took to the snowy peaks of the Town Moor to participate in the first annual NURL sledge off.
The afternoon got off to a flying start as skipper Poops McGeezer was crowned champion in the mens downhill sprint. The “red rocket” proved too much for the ramshackle contraptions driven by his competitors, with notably feeble performances coming from second team captain Naughty Neil and NURLs professor of speed Dr Beansy Urqarqraut.
The joviality of the opening races was shattered as the afternoon progressed, with two factions of the NURL camp clashing in an almighty battle. The stinking Green Dragon team, fronted by fitness freak Daniel Caparros, combined Joe “Breadlift” Dawson, Will “Mr Chicken” Winter, Gaz Baz McHerbertson and Mick McCarthy lookalike Chris Griffiths in the worlds heaviest bobsleigh team. Their competitors, and defenders of the peace, were Charles Lamb Residential Lettings Ltd., consisting of Mikey Ward, Mike Rimmer, Dave Knox, John Kingswood, Russ West and Ian McPherson.
The race got off to a nail biting start, with both teams hitting near walking pace speeds in the opening 20 meters. However, the Snow Owls were the superior force, cruising into a four furlong lead ahead of their pea-brained competitors. The monstrous weight of team Green Dragon proved the difference between the teams, with the drooling Dragons crashing off the slope just after the half way mark, leaving a trail of crushed children in their wake. The victorious Snow Owls cruised over the finish line with lead of eight furlongs, producing a performance even the infamous Ste Moorecroft would be proud of on their way to earning the title as Snow Geezers Of The Year.
After the race, when asked to comment on their performance, the slobbering Green Dragon team were quoted saying: “My Dad likes Monster Munch”.
NURL will be keen to maintain momentum following the success of their first sledge off, as their Stan Calvert grudge match against Northumbria is less than two weeks away.